-
77. Trying to Schedule an Ultrasound at Twenty-Five (it’s impossible)
Today I rose at what felt like the dead of night. A wicked alarm at the foot of my bed came all-too-early: 6 AM to ensure enough time to make room in my bladder for a prescribed 32 ounces of water one hour prior to my ultrasound appointment. I scheduled the appointment for 8 AM on the first Monday of…
-
76. Trying To Not Steal at Twenty-Five
On Asteya (non-stealing) On registering desire and attaining the desired through legitimate means Question(s): What am I stealing? What do I want? What drives humans to steal? How can I be of service to you without feeling entitled to your gratitude? Answers?: Greed for money, hunger for attention I hunger to be admired To be the object of your gratitude…
-
75. Trying to Tidy a Mess I Did Not Make
I used to say that anger didn’t exist in me — I thought I was too good for anger; that it was an emotion reserved for those less evolved than myself and that it was a waste of time I have humbled myself or I myself have been humbled since then I have embarked on a journey into my anger…
-
74. Trying to Make Eye Contact at Twenty-Five
Zimbabwe operates on the US dollar but without any coins — this morning, as I strolled across town in a Saturday tardiness, I struggled through my hangover to calculate how much a stop at the seven to eleven convenience store might cost me; here, when I want to buy a plastic bottle of water for 30 cents, I either pay…
-
71. Trying to Write at Almost Twenty-Five
I met a man who calls himself Matteo. I met him in the mountains and he went on and on within various topics and his most inspired, to me, became his brazen and enthusiastic claim that not all things are meant for all people that some huts should stay huts, that some huts should stay not four-star accommodations with cable…
-
70. Weeks Seven and Eight
All I can see is blessings — like I am wearing blinders to whatever it was that afflicted me before — I felt the fears yesterday — fears of failure and of being held accountable but I think the point is less the fear and more the feeling the fact that I could actually feel the fears. Because fear when…
-
69. Weeks Five and Six
Today had already turned tomorrow, only just, and I was trying to listen to you, an old friend, while I ate room-temperature beef with chimichurri, the fatty pieces were all that was left, and then cantaloupe from a plastic container and then pretzels infused with peanut butter or peanut butter enveloped in pretzel, depending on how you see it, from…
-
66. Trying to Be Held by Friends and Mountains at Twenty-Four
Each of us exists only in relation to others — the way light refracted needs an eye to appear to be a rainbow, the way a cat is not dead until you dig it up and see for yourself I know thoughts are ever-flowing, temporary and timely and a lot of the time, wrong and misleading – especially in their…
-
65. Trying to Say Yes to Things at Twenty-Four
It surprises me, still, to find out new things about my family members, like I cannot imagine that they had lives before I had a life. In my car with a brand new battery, as I drove her home from the Fruitville Lowe’s, my grandmother on my mother’s side recalled to me the details, the ones she chose or the…
-
63. Trying to Get Taxed at Twenty-Four
Unfortunately, I listen to news in the morning because maybe I just need some sort of structure or routine, I guess. And if I’m going to listen to the news, it’s going to be reputable journalism — even if I have to pay for it. And so in the New York Times audio app, I heard a segment about how…
-
Subscribe
Subscribed
Already have a WordPress.com account? Log in now.
Trying To at Twenty-Five: The Blog 